September 2005
I was deeply saddened to see Hurricane Katrina wreak such Havoc on New Orleans and other parts of Louisiana as well as Mississippi and Alabama.

My first girlfriend in high school was Cajun and her family was from New Orleans. It was at her house after a successful crabbing trip that I had the best Seafood Gumbo I have ever eaten in my life. Ironically I just spoke with her recently via our high school reunion site and she is volunteering and helping all the great folks from New Orleans that are staying at the Astrodome in Houston. I am proud to be playing 2 benefit concerts this month and to see how our people have come to the aid of our friends in this time of need and rebuilding.

I have been thinking a lot lately about balance and how silly it is to think of things as “evil” or “bad” or whatever other moniker we choose to superimpose on this fascinating side of our nature. If you really think about it that is what makes the Chinese symbol of yin and yang so simple yet dynamic. You cannot have good without evil and this phenomena permetuates every facet of our culture. In order to be “Superman” you need a “Lex Luthor” A hero is only as great as his villain and depending on whose side you are on the two become a mirror of each other in the big picture. I love Underdog but I even thought that Simon Bar Sinister was cooler. This is what made Larry Bird and Magic Johnson such great rivals. So all of this nonsense of villianizing the devil is what causes man to stray from his nature. When you deny and suppress the “so called” dark side it will come back and haunt you and demand your attention and often overwhelm you. This is back to the strong psychology of “embracing the ugly baby” as well. Have you ever noticed when you try and avoid an issue that you do not want to deal with it comes back to haunt you. Hell sometimes it will come right up and slap you in the face. This is how “balance” works “all things in moderation including moderation. From a scientific point of view Gravity is a problem when you are trying to fly. However flight as we know it would be impossible without the resistance gravity provides. This is what allows us to determine direction during flight as well, without it we would not be able to fly as we know it. I have always wondered what pent-up suppressed issues serial killers and other violent and sadistic criminals have suppressed that causes them to act out in such a way that destroys other peoples lives. It is so easy to just call all of these people “evil” and “wackos” however behind every one of these individuals there is a story and often it can be learned from.

Post WWII there was cabaret clubs popping up in Europe where Women were dancing provocatively in Gas Mask. To make things even stranger men were showing up to watch the women dance in Gas mask as well. The media got a hold of this and started calling it “some kind of cult”……… sound familiar? In the midst of all this hysteria one of my favorite minds ever “Carl Gustav Jung” decided he would have a look into this phenomena. He simply talked with a few of the dancers and men attending the cabarets and found this out:

Schools were segregated in Europe where the girls and boys went to school separately throughout grade school. The only time they were allowed to be together was during lunch which was closely monitored. Well along came WWII and the ensuing air raids. During these raids all the girls and boys were given gas mask and hurried into bomb shelters where they closely huddled together 2-300 people at a time with only a few teachers supervising. This was really the only time they were able to flirt and experiment with heavy petting and the natural sexual experimentation that happens between the sexes. This became a “charged” intense and cherished memory to thousands of people in Europe and later manifested in these cabarets. Now all of a sudden a so called “weird” behavior is not so weird and in actuality very logical.

This why the talking heads in the media often make such goons of themselves, they never take the time to ask quality questions or to check their facts and verify.

They just assume and rush to print and have a breaking story so they can give the “herd” something to chew on for a day until the next headline i.e. “cud” comes along.

For example take a person who has major challenges with jealousy. In the course of their relationships they choose to deny that they have this challenge and suppress it. This works for a little while and then all of a sudden like a volcano bursting they have a major episode that threatens to destroy the very relationship they desire and cherish. Ultimately if you think about it jealousy is a form of “idolatry” and very selfish trait simply due to the fact that it is all about the person that is projecting their jealousy onto their lover. The wisest path in dealing with this would be to “embrace the ugly baby” and develop a new set of beliefs about this phenomena that empower you rather than drain your energy and repel someone you care about. Spend some money on a psychiatrist and work out the jealousy with them during sessions. Go to the Library and get a book on the subject. Find someone you know that is not jealous and that has a successful relationship and take them to lunch and ask them a lot of questions. You see this is not the path of least resistance but as we alluded to earlier “gravity” (resistance) is a powerful tool when we know how to work with the natural forces of nature and use it to our benefit.

When I was in high school everyone had these stickers and t-shirts that said “No Fear” It seemed that everyone was caught up making sure everyone knew that they were fearless and grabbing the “bull by the horns”. Not only do I think that this is silly and one sided which brings us out of balance. There is something deeper here as well;

Fear is awesome and a wonderful natural force of nature that protects us. When you try and deny fear it will definitely come back and slap you in the face. My jiu-jitsu instructor Carlos Machado related to me that he is scared when he is fighting in a match. It is his respect and acknowledgement of fear that keeps him “hyper aware” of his opponents every subtle move. It is fear that keeps him focused and prepared. It is fear that makes him aware of his breathing and his heartbeat as he paces his opponents every move. It is fear and respect for his opponent that keeps him constantly training and developing his skills to a higher level.

There is a great movie entitled “Sirens” that stars Hugh Grant, Sam Neill and Elle McPherson that brilliantly illustrates what happens when we stray from our nature.

The film was shot on location in Australia and this is by far my favorite movie of all time. Sam plays this painter that lives in Australia and Hugh Grant is a preacher who travels with his wife to England to try and talk some sense into this painter at the behest of the Church of England. You see Sam is painting pictures of Nude Women and

One particular painting he created of a women being crucified on the cross is causing controversy. You see this film in set in the early 1900’s and Sam”s character believes that the church is crucifying women and treating them as second class citizens. He believes the church is entirely too Patriarchal and out of balance. You see male and female are very similar balancing forces in nature and look at the way women have been villianized since the dawn of time starting with Eve. I think you will find this movie fascinating and incredibly thought provoking. Rent it and invite some friend over and have a round table discussion on the subject. Let me know what you think and I look forward to hearing from you. October is coming up and what a great time for us all to remember that fear and being scared is OK and a balancing force in nature that actually helps us achieve our goals. Every since I was a child I have always rooted for the underdog and I am just know starting to realize why this trait is such a part of me. I have always had a strong connection with women and understood their plight as well living in such a Patriarchal society. I stood up for my sister when she wanted to shave her legs. You see I think my parents fear was that my sister would get pregnant if she shaved her legs. We went through the same song and dance when they she wanted a car. You see how silly and out of balance our society can be? So this month let’s take charge and bring some balance into our world by embracing whatever “ugly baby” shows up in our lives and make sure and do it with passion!.

Fearfully yours and remember “embrace the ugly baby”

Much Love,

Eric Keyes