I think a person can excel in about three areas of their life at a peak level. A lot of folks are too nebulous and their mind is all over the place. I heard a very elegant description of this phenomena once.
If you had a pile of leaves and you took a magnifying glass and moved it around every couple of minutes hoping to start a fire it aint gonna happen. However, if your intent on starting a fire stay the course, pick your best spot, and hold that magnifying glass there and it will burn.
That leads to today’s blog headline.
How you do anything is how you do everything.
I was very lucky to know what I wanted to do at a very young age. When I was fourteen I dedicated my life to music. A major part of every day of my life since that age has been dedicated to music and musical pursuits.
If I am not singing I’m playing the guitar. If I am not playing the guitar, I’m writing on the piano or rehearsing with my band.
I find many hours a day I am mentoring someone who has musical aspirations as well.
Because my grandmother sang and was such a good cook those two intertwined pleasures in life got embedded in my soul from the start. I would say my third major love after music and food would be the most important of all- people. Especially people to share it with.
I consider relationships a fine art and my love life up to this point has truly been a masterpiece. Sure its hurt from time to time and being vulnerable, open and real has its challenges, but it sure as hell beats holding back and being fake.
Over the years it’s fascinated me how many people just do things halfheartedly, or let me put it a little more eloquently, half ass. You go out and eat in a college town, you sit down at the bar, and you order a Harvey Wallbanger or an Old Fashioned or a Cosmopolitan or a Martini and the douche bag idiot college bar tender, who thinks he’s Tom Cruise in Cocktail, doesn’t even know what it is.
I have a great story about where I live in Denton. I have lived here for twenty years. When I was a kid James Bond, Larry Bird and Randy Rhoads were my heros. James Bond may be a fictional character, but in fictional characters one often finds the most truth. A person’s true dreams and aspirations are more likely to be censored so they wont feel they are being unrealistic or hedonistic in their desires.
When I turned 21 I was living in Denton. My first order of business was to go into a bar and order a vodka martini shaken not stirred. You should’ve seen what happened when I tried this in the very early 90’s in Denton Texas. There wasn’t one knucklehead bar tender in this town that knew how to make them.
I even had these clowns serving me my “martini” in a plastic cup. Pathetic. People wont like me to say this, but I will say it. I am the one who got the bartender at Cool Beans to start serving martini’s and get the martini glasses. I ordered them all the time, and ordered them for my friends. We even put the martini in the logo on the original Riddle Me This sticker.
I felt the same way then as I did 20 years later when I got sick and tired of having to drive to Dallas to eat authentic Japanese food. I started having Kei Nagano, a dear friend who is a great chef, cook at my birthday party every year here.
The other thing that cracks me up is how people think I am rich. I am rich in friends, and experiences and well on my way to the one thing everybody seems to focus on.
Its a shame because the only reason they think that, is because I know how to live. I don’t hold back. Life is too short to ever make excuses for your desires.
The only thing that happens if you wait is you get older.
This is why people get pissed off when you live your life on the edge. It forces them to look in the mirror and deal with their own mediocrity and mundane excuses about why they aren’t where they think they should be.
All blame is a waste of time. All it does is put the emphasis off you to do anything about your mediocrity and allow you some temporary distraction from your bullshit by projecting it onto the person who has the balls to live their life and write their own story.
It’s funny, it’s sad, and it’s a host of other things, but it’s just the truth, and most people cannot handle the truth. I didn’t invent this, I just have a keen eye, and an even deeper heart for people who have the courage to do it their own way.
Look at Jerry Weintraub. Watch the film His Way. Look at Larry Bird, he was a champion in high school, he was a champion in college, he was a champion in the NBA. An MVP of the entire league three times. In his first year as a coach he took the Indiana Pacers to the NBA finals. Just this year he was named top executive of the NBA Indiana Pacers. That’s how you live. Larry cuts his own grass, chops his own firewood, and he doesn’t walk around with bodyguards and a entourage. He would probably just kick your ass himself if you messed with him. I bet you he washes his dishes bad ass. I know I do. Wake up. Quit rewarding mediocrity. When the douche bag waiter at the half-ass restaurant, that you should question why you are going to in the first place, looks at his watch and rolls his eyes when you send back your order because it wasn’t done right- Call him out on it.
When one of the guys in your band is late to rehearsal, talk to him about it. Don’t take your girlfriend for granted. Treat your relationship with her like you were painting a masterpiece. Have you ever taken a look at how Salvador Dali lived his life? He had lavish dinner parties, orgies, hung out with people like Maxwell Maltz who wrote Psycho-cybernetics. He was even good friends with Alice Cooper.
That’s the way to live. We’ve gotten so far away from designing our own lives and in the wise words of Steve Jobs I will close with this:
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.